Saturday, April 27, 2019

What Mastering Your Emotions Actually Looks Like


This is me having a bad week. 

This is what mastering your emotions actually looks like--> 
I know, I don’t look devastated or anything like that. A little frazzled maybe? But that’s okay. I can handle frazzled.

Notice also I look like a normal human being. You know, just a mom trying to get through her day, check off some to do items, work on her new business offering, get a work out in, take her kids to school, and edit the final draft of her novel.

Notice I am NOT some Hindu or Buddhist guru isolated in a monastery somewhere high on a mountain. Mastering your emotions isn't about hiding away from the life or obtaining some elusive state of enlightenment, although it's part of that journey.

Mastering your emotions is about learning how to deal with your emotions as they come up, being compassionate with yourself, and learning to ride the waves of change, and know what to do when you get thrown for a loop.

I don't look emotionally strung out or especially serene. 

I look like a real human. I made time and space to deal with how I felt over the announcement that my kids' school was closing. (More details about that in my next post) so I don't look especially upset in this photo. Not because I'm suppressing my emotions, but because I actually let myself feel them in private with people who have earned my trust.

 I also wasn't painting on a smile this week. I didn't force myself to paste on an insincere smile or negate how I was actually feeling in any way. I'm not serene in this picture. You can tell something's going on, but I'm also able to function as I ran to the grocery store.

I didn’t get all the things on my to-do list done.

Yeah, because instead, I went to school and talked to the board, the director, the teachers, the staff, the students. . .I dealt with what was happening. Mastering emotions requires not only feeling what you feel when you need to feel it, but also addressing why you're feeling that way in the first place.

I didn’t meet all my personal and professional goals, either. 

Instead, I spent vital time journaling and crying and venting and walking and meditating through my emotions. I spent quality time discussing the issue with people who could give me answers and help me find solutions. I could have pushed all the feels down and forced myself to make all the planned things happen, but instead, I took time to deal. 

Because if I hadn’t, I’m sure my emotions would have backed up on me and this morning when I finally had a moment to sit still, I would have been a frackin' mess. I would have had a severe case of the emotional flu that might have lasted for weeks. I took time to figure out what questions I needed to ask, what concerns I needed to express and then I asked and I expressed.

And guess what? Taking a little time now has been so much better than being drained all week, losing my motivation, and getting seriously derailed from the rest of my life. This way, I'm still moving forward, maybe a little slower right now, but I'm still moving.

I cried in this morning’s green tea. 

I still have some feelings to process: anger, sadness, grief, anxiety... and I’ll continue to work through the emotional cycle as the last week's of school go by. I will continue to practice self-awareness: how am I feeling? What do I need to do to express that feeling? What is this feeling telling me? Is there something I need to do? If so, I'll make a note of it in my journal and make time to deal.

I'm decompressing this weekend.

So instead of being too wrung out to function today, I’m gearing up for a local street festival and maybe a movie this evening with the fam squad. It's so important not to dwell, too. Too much "emotional processing" can turn quickly into wallowing. 

An emotions master doesn't wallow. She doesn't feed the emotion. She tends to it, feels it, expresses it, identifies where it comes from and what it means, releases the emotion, and takes necessary actions.

Because life goes on. . .

I’ve taught myself how to work with my emotions instead of letting them work me over and it has been the best investment of my time and energy, hands down. Emotions are not meant to rule us; emotions are meant to guide us away from what's not serving our highest good and toward what is. Emotions are a compass we should and need to use to navigate not only our day-to-day life, but also our spiritual journey.

Emotions are energy and a tool. You can allow them to drain you and tear you apart, like a freight train dragging you down the tracks, OR you can turn it around and wield their power like a power washer, cleaning and clearing away the gunk so the real you can shine through.

What have you learned about mastering your emotions? Share your techniques in the comments so we can build each other up.

Much healing love and light to each and every one of you.

Peace out.

Saturday, March 16, 2019

Why Not Trusting Yourself is Fucking Up Your Life

Consider this your invitation: 
This is me, Melissa, founder of
The Karma Couch.
To answer the call.
To be the real you.
To trust yourself. 

Are you open to receiving it? Because I know sometimes I’m really not. Then I wonder why things aren’t happening the way I want them to, why despite all my efforts I still feel unsatisfied or the money isn't flowing, or the book isn't selling or a hundred and one things that aren't happening that I want to happen. Now.

Shutting down my heart and putting up walls between me and the rest of the world is NOT an abundant way to live. 
Did you know this is why you’re not getting what you want? Why you’re not loving your life? When you're not being the real you and trusting yourself NOTHING FLOWS.

When you’re afraid who you really are is unacceptable to your friends and family, you build a fortress of distrust. And what I’m figuring out is that wall not only keeps out the criticism and judgment, but it also keeps EVERYTHING I WANT OUT TOO. 

This is the essence of the scarcity mindset. 
Is your mind blown yet?

I’m not suggesting we should walk around without any defenses. 
What I’m saying is when I’m being closed off, critical, distrustful, and wary, nothing flows. I’m the opposite of open to receive. 

And then I wonder why nothings happening, why the money’s not flowing, why the creative vibe has left me, why my life doesn’t feel like it should. Like I’m out of sync, alone, lost.

Yes, it’s hard to trust and be the real you in front of others. It takes courage to stand in your truth. But the more I do it despite my fear, the more confident I am becoming. First, I opened up to my closest loved ones. That was surprisingly hard and cathartic. The next step was my closest friends, then to the broader circle. Now, publicly. 

But you know what? I've learned a good lesson there, too: not everyone deserves a seat at the table of your truth. And certainly at the beginning you need to hold your truth close to your heart until your confidence grows. Don't let the world kill your dreams before they even have a chance to hatch, pick your confidants wisely.

I’m a work in progress running toward the light. 
I'm learning to trust myself and lean into the flow and process of life because everything I want my life to be requires that I do. And when you’re learning this lesson, when you’re stepping into the real you, you need your tribe: people who get you and what you’re trying to do. 

If you aren’t surrounded by like-minded souls who understand where you are on your journey and unconditionally support and love you, I invite you to join my tribe of soulful seekers. We hold space for each other in a safe, heart-centered and fun-loving environment. Click HERE to sign up for my newsletter and receive a link to join our private Facebook group.


You don’t have to do this alone. ❤️🙌🏻✨😊🌙

Wednesday, February 27, 2019

The Unconventional Guide to Funks

Ever find yourself in a funk? You're walking around with your head hanging down, your hands
jammed into your pockets, and your mind in a dark fog. Sometimes angry bees buzz in your head, but often it's a general, low-grade kind of emotional headache you can't seem to shake off.

I used to be really bad at dealing with funks. I would succumb to them, disappear into my bedroom, turn off the lights, and watch TV in the dark for days.

Thankfully, I tended to turn on The Comedy channel at 2 am to watch stand up and re-runs of Whose Line is It Anyway?. I quickly learned that laughter is really the best medicine for funks. While this didn't always chase away the funk, it eased the pain.

I was a champion Funk Wallower. My sleepless nights bathed in the eerie glow of the TV lead me to the dark side: anger, depression, fear, anxiety, lashing out.

It was a self-perpetuating cycle. As the depression sunk in, I spent more sleepless nights soaking in the bad thoughts, which fed the feels... I went down some scary-ass rabbit holes, ones I thought I'd never climb out of.

Soooo...what did I do when that happened? Well, besides getting some professional help, which I HIGHLY recommend if you think you might be clinically depressed or battling with more than your garden variety anxiety, I stumbled upon an unconventional process for when the funk got it's claws in me. I say "unconventional" because the general advise I got was to ignore it. Get up, go about your day, exercise, eat right, and whenever the bad thoughts came along, quickly think about something else.

And while that worked a little bit some of the time, it was by no means the solution.

Through literal trial and error, I figured out four steps to deal with a funk that won't go away. This was quite the experiment over the years, let me tell you. It wasn't a straight line or obvious at first. And the last step was, well, the LAST step that finally broke the cycle and it's a doozy.

It changed everything for me.

But now I know. And now YOU will too. You don't have to be a prisoner of the funk. You can escape and here's how:

STEP 1: FEEL IT

Sometimes, a funk needs to be felt. Seriously. I have a tendency to push the uncomfortable feelings aside when I'm busy getting shit done. I have kids, a dog, a hubs, a job, a house, this blog, a LIFE to deal with. But feelings don't work that way. You can't just push them aside day after day and not experience repercussion.

Picture an overflowing garbage can in your kitchen. You can only push it down so many times before the lid falls off because its so jam-packed (I'm looking at you, my teenage son). Think of your emotions this way. They don't always just disappear when you don't want to feel them. They often get thrown in a mental receptacle waiting for you to take out the trash. If you don't, it starts to stink, the lid won't keep it in anymore, and voila! You've just created a funk!

So, now what? Now, you feel it. You find some time to go for a walk, sit alone in your room, and unpack that mess. I use a walking meditation technique that isn't as fancy as it sounds. All I do is start walking in and start paying attention to the way I feel physically which always leads to how I'm feeling emotionally. When the emotion starts to flow, I let it.

This is different from wallowing because I observe the feeling without judging. Well, I try not to judge. I'm still learning how to feel and not make judgment statements about how I feel. I know I'm judging when I say things to myself like "I shouldn't feel this way?" or "I hate feeling this way!" There's no "should" in feelings. You feel what you feel. End of story.

It's neither right nor wrong to feel any certain way. The way you and I feel is based on our thoughts and beliefs. Punishing ourselves for feeling a certain way doesn't help; it's what causes funks in the first place.

Feel it. Don't judge it. Don't push the feeling away.

STEP 2: EXPRESS IT


Once the feeling gets rolling I usually cry or yell or draw or write. If I'm on a walking meditation I sometimes run my ass off and have even been known to jump up and down on big, fallen branches out in the woods. Oh yeah, I have. I've also demolished the stack of cardboard boxes by the outside trash cans, busted up scrap wood, and have even swung an ax chopping up kindling. It's satisfying, but shouldn't really be done in a fit of rage, if you know what I mean.

I've even smashed glass bottles against cement blocks, but I don't' recommend this unless you put some heavy duty plastic sheets around the area or else you'll be grumbling under your breath as you painstakingly clean up after yourself.

And then make sure you use your big brain and articulate how you're feeling. Explaining as best you can to yourself, write it down preferably. If you have a friend or family member you trust implicitly, tell them how you feel. Getting it off your chest is huge.

Whatever you do to express your feelings keep these safety regs in mind:
  1. Do not take your feelings out on other living beings. Ever. 
  1. If you feel the need to break things, make sure it's your stuff and preferably something you were going to throw out anyway. Believe me, it's much more satisfying to bust up the old Lazy Boy you were taking to the dump anyway than the new dining room chair you just spend $200 on. 
  1. Be safe. Always. 
  1. Articulate exactly what you're feeling to the best of your ability. All the physical crying, slamming, yelling, wailing, and smashing is helpful, but it doesn't satisfy the human need for understanding. We need this part the most.

STEP 3: UNDERSTAND IT


This step is vital. So are the others, but this step must happen or you are doomed to repeat the funk cycle. Every time you cycle around to the funk, it is an invitation to TAKE OUT THE TRASH. FEeling the feels and expressing them has to happen, but if you don't figure out why the funk happened in the first place, you will find yourself right back here, knee deep in the trash compactor waiting to be crushed.

After all the yelling and crying, you'll need a break. Maybe a shower, a cup of tea, or a little exercise. Then get out a notepad or a journal and ask yourself why you feel this way. Don't overthink it. Just write. You'll be surprised at what comes out. 

Pen not flowing? Get out your Tarot deck and pull a card. Write about the card for ten minutes. What thoughts and feelings do the images invoke? You'll also be surprised what will come to the surface. Often times, if we dig a little we'll find a limiting belief is surfacing, something we believe on a subconscious level that is interfering with our goals, our dreams, or just our happiness.

After you've explored the reason you feel this way, ask yourself "What do I get out of holding on to this thought or belief?" Write for a good 10 minutes. Again, if you get stuck, pull a Tarot card and keep going.

The last part is to write a clear, succinct sentence or two about why you felt the way you do. Get really clear because that's the only way to rewrite it.

Which is the next step.

STEP 4: REWRITE IT


You fell into a funk because of a thought or a belief about what was happening in your life. If you don't want to get lost in the dark, you have to rewrite it. You have to update your programming. Feelings are symptoms of thoughts and beliefs, not the other way around. I know that seems backwards but it's true.

We feel a certain way THEN the dark thoughts come, right? But underlying the initial feeling is a subconsious thought or belief. It's hidden under the dark waters of our unconscious mind, so when the emotion surfaces like a white shark leaping out of the dark depths it can feel terrifyingly sudden, as if it came out of no where.

But sharks can't live without ocean, and your feelings can't live without thoughts. And the thoughts are what you unconvered in Step 3. Now, you're going to change those thoughts. This is an ongoing process and takes time. It might not happen overnight. But then again, I have uncovered limiting beliefs and once they saw the light of day they POOFED away like a vampire in the sun.

When that doesn't happen, we have to work at it a little bit. So here's what you do: rewrite the limiting belief or thought in a positive way that helps you instead of hurts you. I literally write these on a 3x5 index card. Limiting thought on one side, helpful thought on the other. 

Here's an example.


Limiting thought: I am afraid of failing because I will let my family down.

Helpful thought: Every time I try something new, I learn something new and build my skills. This will help me take care of my family.

Or whatever you would find lifts you out of the fog. 

This does take some practice. You might find you need to rewrite the helpful thought a few times before it starts to work. I carry my index card with me wherever I go. Whenever the feeling that put me in the funk starts to surface, I know my old programming has kicked in. I stop, get out my index card and flip the script to the Helpful Thought: Every time I try something new, I learn something new and build my skills. This will help me take care of my family.

ANd if you find youself in a funk again? Repeat the steps. 

Ultimately, funks are an invitation to make better choices about what you think and believe. Within the funk is the seed of opportunity to change your life for the better. You can get lost in your funk or you can get on with your funk. 

It's your choice.



 Do you want some help getting out of your funk? Are you ready to create a life you truly love by mixing spiritual practices with hardcore science and proven psychological strategies? Then join my private Facebook group The Karma Couch Connection. We're a tribe of heart-led, spirit-fed practical souls supporting each other to not only feel better, but to embrace our true Selves and live inspired lives. CLICK HERE TO REQUEST TO JOIN MY PRIVATE FACEBOOK GROUP 

Friday, February 1, 2019

3 Simple Steps to Feeling Better: The Only Short Cut That Works

Everyone wants to feel better. Everything we do is about creating a certain feeling such as happiness, contentment, or satisfaction. Want to lose weight? Get a new job? Find the love of your life? Win a Pulitzer prize? Make a million dollars? I can almost guarantee you that what you are really after is a certain feeling. Sure, if those things happened, there would be all kinds of benefits too, but what if I told you, you didn’t need any of it to feel the way you long to feel?

You don't need any thing to feel the way you long to feel.

What if I told you all you had to do was change the way you think? Change the way you think and believe, and you will change the way you feel. Thoughts determine how you feel. Beliefs determine how you feel. Everything you’ve been looking for is already available to you right now, if you choose to change your thoughts. It really is that simple.
Now, easy is an entirely different matter.
It’s not easy.

It’s simple, but its not easy.


And what if I told you that changing the way you feel right now is the key to achieving all those things you want? See, we’ve gotten it BACKWARD. The feeling comes first, THEN the achievement. We’ve been conditioned to believe in order to be happy we must acquire a certain body shape, a certain amount of money, or a certain amount of recognition. Where did we get this idea? 
Advertising.
Yes.

From the moment we are born, at least starting in the second half of the 20th century, modern humans who have access to newspapers, magazines, books, television, radios, and more recently smartphones, laptops, computers, and tablets are inundated with the message that to feel better we must acquire something. 


Did you know advertising is designed to effect behavioral change? And social media is the advertiser's wet dream. Ask any marketing expert and they’ll tell you how fantastic Facebook ad results can be, if you know how to work the system. 
Why? 
Because it’s possible to create a profile on each Facebook user, a profile so precise and intricate Facebook brags in “secret” negotiations (not really secret anymore) with advertisers how they can identify when its users are depressed or having their periods.

I kid you not.


In effect, you are bombarded relentlessly by targeted ad campaigns with the sole purpose to convince you that you can’t live another minute without their product or service. 
How is this done? 
By identifying your pain points and your pleasure points.
In essence, any business or entrepreneur worth their salt has spent money and time figuring out what you want and what you don’t want. They have used surveys and keyword data; Facebook , Google, and Amazon log and analyze your online activity, even the stuff you typed, but then deleted before you posted. Even what you send in those messenger apps. It’s all logged in a huge database and analyzed forward and backward, sideways and inside out.
Then advertisers pay top dollar to target you and your pain and your hopes and dreams so they can sell you the relief, the solution, and the euphoria.
Now that I’ve made advertisers and the people who facilitate their efforts sound like the Devil incarnate…

I DON'T think advertising is innately wrong or wicked.

I love some of the products and services I’ve discovered because of these tactics. I’ve found books and gadgets and courses that have changed my life. Really.

As an entrepreneur, I've found readers for this blog and my books with this kind of advertising, too.
But one of the negative consequences of 24/7 advertising is we ALL feel less than, inadequate, and unfulfilled because we are constantly bombarded with the message that we would be so much happier if…we bought this product or hired this coach or took this course or ate this way or exercised that way. 
All our problems would go away if only we could achieve X or Y or Z and their products will help you do that.
Some of these advertisers sincerely want to help you.
Some.

Some advertisers are selling us a bad dream and calling it a short cut.


So how do we tell the difference between the real transformational opportunities and the emotional manipulation?
By figuring what it truly takes to make us happy.
 And just for a moment consider: what if I'm right? and it’s a simple matter of changing the way you think?


Are you ready?

If so, I can get you started right now. No down payment required because I'm giving it to you for free. ;-)

Step 1: Stop chasing the feeling

Start creating it.
With your thoughts.
You’ve all heard about the gratitude journal, right? Start there. First thing in the morning write down 5 things you are grateful for. It can be as simple as the pillow under your head. But I also encourage you to get specific. Use descriptors and try not to repeat yourself. If you’re really stuck, don’t worry about getting it right, just do it.

Step 2: Gather proof that your life is already pretty great.

Spend your day looking for the evidence that your life is already pretty great. Look for the moments of abundance: a kind sales clerk who takes the extra time to help you with your return, the penny on the sidewalk as you walk to lunch, the convenient parking spot when you’re pressed for time, the cell phone in your hand, or the right medicine at the right time.
When you crawl into bed tonight, add this body of proof to your gratitude journal. Just make a list. Don’t worry about sentence structure or even spelling. Just write it down. As you build your body of proof that your life is full of things to be grateful for AND abundance in all it’s forms, you will begin to cultivate the feeling all those manufacturers are trying to sell you: happiness, contentment, satisfaction, or just feeling BETTER than you do right now.
You want to feel better, but you need to make it happen on your terms. I have nothing against a good product or service and I promote them shamelessly: I love my Foursigmatic Mushroom Hot Cacao and my luscious doTERRA essential oils. They spark joy and fulfill a real need in my life. But I chose them because they speak to my already abundant mindset, not because I feel I lack anything.

Step 3: Repeat Daily. 

If you do this gratitude and abundance practice daily, you’ll soon be able to sort out which products and services have the right transformational experience for you because you’ll no longer be chasing a feeling. Instead, you’ll be cultivating it for yourself.
Now that’s true transformation and a short cut to feeling better right now.


 Are you ready to create a life you truly love by mixing spiritual practices with hardcore science and proven psychological strategies? Then join my private Facebook group The Karma Couch Connection. We're a tribe of heart-led, spirit-fed practical souls supporting each other to not only feel better, but to embrace our true Selves and live inspired lives. CLICK HERE TO REQUEST TO JOIN MY PRIVATE FACEBOOK GROUP 



 **As always, any links in my post may be affiliate links which means if you click and buy, I get a few pennies to keep this blog rolling. Thanks!*** 

Saturday, December 15, 2018

Why The Phases of the Moon Will Make you Question Everything


I’m about to get totally woo-woo on you...and share how the lunar cycle has changed my life: or I should say how getting in alignment with the moon has made me question everything my teachers taught me. 



The Science

I’ve always been fascinated with the moon and it’s ever-changing face. I knew it’s cycle intimately living outside in the woods for 6 months some 20 years ago.
From the dark moon, also the New Moon, to the sliver of a moon- the crescent, to the radiant, glorious glowing orb of the Full Moon I've followed her dance across the sky time and time again. And much like my ancestors, I'm sure, I've wondered and pondered and measured and made correlations between her cycle and everything on this planet.
I've read a ton of the science about the moon’s orbit, watched documentaries about how it might have come into existence. I studied tides in school and was blown away to learn that the moon's gravitational pull is probably integral to the Earth’s and to human being’s evolution.
I've even delved into the moon landing and all the conspiracies around that business. Is the moon really an alien observation ship? Did it ring like a bell when the Apollo expedition dropped our space junk on it? ;-)



The Myth

Then I dug into the mythology and lore: werewolves, insanity, and crazy ER stories. There's way too much to go into it, but suffice it to say humans have known for a very long time that the moon has an effect on us. It’s in our stories and our psyche, although Scientific American published an article telling us why we're all luny to believe it.


The Magic

Next, I studied all the magical grimoires, Amazon titles, and pagan blogs to learn about how New Moons are for making wishes and Full Moons are for letting shit go. Apparently, you can bring love, money, and good health into your life if you perform the right ritual at the right time. And according to this Throught Catalogue post you can even detox with the right moon phase and phrase.
All of this moon fascination has led me to an amazing course I’m taking called Moon Goddess Training with the Luscious Hustle gals, Betsy and Laura. We just got started BUT I’ve been consciously working with the moon on my own now for over a year based on the book Moonology by Yasmin Boland and I can tell you that a LOT has changed for me.



The Why

By curiously exploring the energy shifts of the lunar cycles and how they align with my own internal shifts, I’ve started making things happen I felt stymied about in the past. Pretty crazy, huh?
Things are happening! I am so much more patient and productive then I’ve ever been. Is it magic? Or is it learning my natural cycles of creativity, productivity, and rest and how they align with the lunar phases?
I suspect a little bit of both.
Because I like believing in magic. 😘 It’s fun.
And I love studying the human animal in all her glory, including how we mentally, physically, and emotionally function at our best.



The Opportunity

We often miss out on opportunities to level up our lives because we resist thinking outside the box. Scientific American has a particular mission: to be the "leading authoritative force for the science discoveries and technology innovations that matter." So, of course, they are going to question the validity of the moon's effect on human behavior. Their interest in the soul is about finding a way to measure, weigh, and define it in a scientifically accepted manner, not feel the magic of being a soul having a human experience. At least I don't think so. ;-)
I was always all about the science. Give me studies. Give me investigations and intellectually stimulating debate. But eventually I discovered it was limited by its very insistence on strict interpretations based on very careful data collection methods. My friends, life is just not that neat and tidy. It's messy. Enter quantum physics. Talk about messy!
It's messiness is exactly why I love it so much. I love when humans get stymied. I love when we hit the limits of our understanding. It's a fascinating place to be, really. If you're willing to let go of everything you've ever believed...
But our strict reliance on data and logic means we resist what can't be clearly examined and defined. It's the left brain leaning mentality. Facts. Give us facts. But much of life, dare I say it, is a mystery. Venturing into the dark, into the murky waters of intuition and gut feeling is so...woo woo, the realm of adolescent rebellion and hedonistic, pagan Burning Man rituals, NOT the realm of smarty pants intellectuals. 
Therefore, for any self-respecting intelligent person like ourselves, it's far safer to stick with the tried and true, the socially acceptable, and our family's ways of doing things. It’s easier to avoid the conflict caused by thinking differently or entertaining the thought that Shakespeare was right: there are indeed more things in heaven and on earth than we can ever dream of.
Until it’s not.
Until staying safe inside our tightly closed world becomes more painful than taking the risk to bloom into our ever,-expansive possibilities.

And that, my friends, is why the phases of the moon will make you question everything. Give it a try. What do you have to lose?

There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, 

Than are dreamt of in your philosophy. 

Hamlet (1.5.167-8), Hamlet to Horatio


Just something to think about.

Sending y’all much love and healing light this weekend.
Namaste.
Are you ready to trust yourself more and get in alignment with your soul's purpose, but not sure where to start? FABULOUS! That's what I'm here for. Sign up for my newsletter and you'll not only get my weekly practical spiritual ideas for creating the life you love, you'll also get my 5 Tarot Practices to Activate Your Intuition. CLICK HERE TO SUBSCRIBE TO MY HIGH VIBE NEWSLETTER

Are you ready to create a life you truly love mixing spiritual practices with hardcore science and proven psychological strategies? Then you NEED to join my private Facebook group The Karma Couch Connection. We're a group of heart-led, spirit-fed practical souls supporting each other in raising our vibrations. CLICK HERE TO REQUEST TO JOIN MY PRIVATE FACEBOOK GROUP 

Want to feel better and be happier? Ready to get in flow and create some magic in yoru life? Need some spiritual guidance and practical life coaching about how to get out of the cynical mindset and transform your life into one you love, instead of settling for the one you have? Are you ready to step outside the box and open youself up to your full potential? If something inside you is whipsering "Yeeeeesssss" then CLICK HERE TO REQUEST A DISCOVERY CONSULT 

***As always, any links in my post may be affiliate links which means if you click and buy, I get a few pennies to keep this blog rolling. Thanks!*** 


Sunday, September 30, 2018

I Look for Things to be Thankful For

Sunday Morning Musings
In the back of my mind always is a hiking metaphor for life, but not a weekend backpacking trip or a day hike up to Old Rag and back.
Life is a Thru-hike: a long journey with the ultimate goal not to get to the end point, Death (which who are we kidding, isn't really an end but a part of a much larger journey than we can conceive of), but to make the absolute most of the steps in between.
Friday was the 20th anniversary of the endpoint, aka Summit day, of my Thru-hike of the Appalachian Trail and this picture of me and my husband sums up so much of that journey.
So I asked Source this morning: Where am I on my journey, now? What do I need to be doing right now? What is my next step?
Then I drew the first three cards from Louise Hay's How to Love Yourself Cards: a deck of 64 affirmations.
I think the message is absolutely clear and I’m not at all surprised that the centerpiece, the keystone, is to be thankful.
Gratitude is so powerful because it releases the past, trusts the outcome, and fully, joyfully embraces the present.
Peace out


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Monday, July 23, 2018

Only the Worriers Survive

I’ve been working on shifting my perspective on negativity and complaining. Overall, I’ve been avoiding anything and everything angry lately, especially in the toxic political arena. 

But I have become aware of my own negativity in my efforts to be positive. Is it possible that my own negativity is influencing the way I perceive? Absolutely! Because we see things as we are, not as they are. 

So I asked myself how can I see things differently? How can I change my negative perception of the toxic atmosphere around politics? And even and especially the people  presenting the negativity?

So far here’s what I’ve come up with: 

Human beings are wired to be negative. Yes, we are. We are wired to worry and to project and to assume the worst. Why am I so sure? Because the earliest humans who assumed the noise in the bush was a long-toothed hungry tiger got the heck out of there and survived. 

The easy going fellow who laughed it off was eaten. 

So even if the overly worried and anxious guy was wrong 19 out of 20 times, he was right when it counted and lived to pass on his worry genes.

The guy who was relaxed and was right 19 out of 20 times got eaten because he was wrong just one, very crucial time.

So here’s my new outlook: it’s human nature to assume the worst. It’s okay because it’s part of who we are and how we have survived this long. It only makes sense that this doom and gloom outlook on life would reach a fever-pitched crescendo in social media. 

We are wired to worry. 

The pay off for changing my perspective? I can let go of my frustration and hurt feelings. I can just let it go. My friends' political posts are all about spreading the word; they’re just looking out for me. 

I can be grateful that friends are giving the high alert signal because that’s what tribe mates do: alert each other of danger and look out for one another. 

BUT I also recognize that this is our human tendency and that 19 out of 20 times the perceived danger is not real. It’s wise to be cautious, but it’s not helpful to constantly be terrified.

While I’ll still take precautions to not get caught up in the toxicity, I at least can peek at my friends' timelines again with a new understanding and less stress. 

What do you think? 


Are you ready to create peace and joy in your life but need some help? FABULOUS! That's what I'm here for. Sign up for my newsletter and you'll not only get weekly practical spiritual ideas for creating the life you desire you'll also get my 5 Tarot Practices to Activate Your Intuition. CLICK HERE TO SUBSCRIBE TO MY HIGH VIBE NEWSLETTER

And if you're ready to learn more about what it takes to transform the way you feel and make a life you love, then you NEED to join my private Facebook group The Karma Couch Connection where we support each other in raising our vibrations. CLICK HERE TO REQUEST TO JOIN MY PRIVATE FACEBOOK GROUP 

Want to deep dive into taking charge of your emotions and changing your life? Need some spiritual guidance and practical life coaching about how to get out of the cynical mindset and transform your life into one you love, instead of settling for the one you have? Are you ready to believe in the potential for wishes coming true but don't know where to start? CLICK HERE TO REQUEST A DISCOVERY CONSULT 











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